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Writer's pictureStijn Smeets

on being a monk

Updated: Sep 24

Although many people associate monasteries with particular religions, celibacy, and solitude, being a monk at the House of the beloved does neither require nor exclude any of these. As a community, we're not part of any tradition (although individual monks can be), and we welcome all that is human (togetherness, body, sexuality, expressing intense emotions, etc.) as a spiritual practice.


What then does it mean to be a monk?


At the core of life as a monk is the inexorable willingness to be fully available, to stand naked at the edge of our awareness and let ourselves be devoured by the moment. 


For me personally, being a monk at the House of the beloved means to feel a deep desire.. 


  • to completely give myself up to a calling -a silent whisper that shares its birthplace with dreams, visions, mystical experiences, and intuition- and by giving myself up, allow a life to be revealed through me.

  • to shape my life around the question “What in the face of death is worth living for?”

  • to practice unconditional love (i.e., cultivate the will to extend myself to support the existential development of myself and all others)

  • to faithfully risk myself, to expose myself over and over again to annihilation so that what is indestructible can arise within me.

  • to dedicate myself completely and continuously to attaining a permanent, non-symbolic experience of reality and become immersed in life without the mediation of language.

  • to become useless to the world, resisting instrumental reasoning, and the societal pressures to conform, consume, perform, produce, be healthy, be happy, and be efficient.

  • to joyfully accept constraints (including the monastic rhythm and monastic vows) that help me antidote my tendencies and allow for non-habitual states of awareness and aesthetic enjoyment.


You can read more in depth about each of these intuitions here


House of the beloved welcomes all journeyers who hear a calling to become a monk, regardless of their philosophies of life, traditions, religions, gender, or sexual orientation. Placing diversity and difference at its core, the communal and monastic life is a “being-different-together".


If you feel a (strange) pull to try this out, let us know.

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